And Two Little Children Shall Lead Them ... Into Hell

I had an interesting thought just a moment ago as I scrolled through the websites of major news organizations to see the headlines on the disappointing Congressional (un)super committee charged with finding a balance to help reduce the deficit. I'm starting to see the world more in narrative, and watching that shit show unfold reminded me of children fighting in a sandbox while their parents chat about pointless reality show/celebrity bullshit.

The parallels are striking. Obviously, little Johnny Democrat and little Joey Republican--yes, they're boys because representation is gender biased--couldn't decide how to use the toy shovel and bucket to construct a sand castle (deficit reduction plan). Actually, they couldn't even decide what to build. Johnny Democrat wanted to borrow more sand from another sandbox to build wind farms while Joey Republican wanted to take the poorest sand in the sandbox and construct a monument of Carl Rove massaging Ronald Reagan with exotic oils.

Both boys threw out the classic rhetoric: "You're a doo-doo head!" "No, you're a doo-doo head!" It became increasingly obvious that this sand castle would never be built even as some of the other children (other members of Congress) insisted that they were both doo-doo heads for fighting. Johnny Democrat cried that Joey Republican wasn't sharing, and Joey Republican cried that Johnny Democrat wanted to much. Ultimately, they both just soiled themselves and cried that the other had ruined the sand castle plan.

But where were the parents (in theory citizens of the United States)? Where were the people who control and guide Johnny Democrat and Joey Republican? They were sitting on a bench talking about Dancing with the Stars and Jersey Shore. Every now and then, they looked up and yelled at the two boys to play nice. Every once in a while, they went over to chastise a naughty little Republican for bashing Johnny in the head with a shovel or to give a stern talking to to Johnny for calling Joey a name. Then, right back to the bench and more in depth discussion on which celebrity is pregnant and how many husbands and sex tapes the Kardashians have. Tantalizing, real-world, important stuff.

'My dad could beat up your dad.' 'No. my dad could beat up your dad.'

Perhaps Johnny Democrat and Joey Republican have grown to large for the scolding words of a parent. It seems so. But whose fault is that? It's the parents' playground (country) to run, and yet, the children rule the roost (mixing metaphors feels right). Johnny and Joey aren't little boys anymore. They're big hulking bastards with egos the size of planets and brains the size of peanuts. Essentially, they're teenagers. They've had free run of the playground, and now they don't need to listen to a damn thing anybody tells them because they've got this playground figured out. They can build a sand castle with their eyes closed if only the other kids didn't get in their way.

It's easy to blame the child for this issue, and to a large degree that's fine. It was Johnny and Joey's job to build the damn sand castle, and they fucked it up something fierce. But it's the job of parents to place children in that sandbox who can play nice with others and behave like semi-civilized human beings. It's their job to raise children who listen to their parents.

As anyone who has ever met a child who has lost any semblance of being respectful to authority knows, there is a point of no return. Johnny Democrat and Joey Republican may have hit that point. What will bring down this playground? Turn it into a playground people don't really want to go to anymore? How about a couple of loud-mouth, disrespectful, full-grown bullies who can't even build a sand castle.